People are way more complicated than data.

People need a ton of leadership training, practice opportunities, and safety to experiment and learn how to lead well.

It this gets the point across, it achieved it’s goal.

Photo by Simon Wijers on Unsplash

This may be written badly from a gramattical perspective and it may have spelling errors.

And despite that — you will get the point.

Bad religion

The world had made a religion of “getting it right”.

People put incredible effort, time, and emotional struggle into following all the right steps to have it be “correct”.


This behavior does not guarantee career success, a happy spouse, great relationships, or even successful children. It only guarantess that someone can say “I followed the rules”.

In many cases, it leads to failed careers, divorce, co-dependent relationships, and clinically depressed kids (yep, I’m going there).

Winfrey, Musk, Hart, et all

Or Command and Control vs Coaching

Photo by Yogendra Singh on Unsplash

I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately, reading on the topic, talking with leadership trainers, and analyzing when/how I’ve been involved with exceptional teams vs not-so-exceptional teams.


I keep coming back to the same teeter-toter of command & control vs coaching. When I look at high performing organizations, they commonly have a coaching environment and mindset.

These are orgs where coaching is a part of the culture, a conscious decision.

The high performing orgs benefited from leaders who were happy to coach anyone into better performance. Those leaders didn’t need control because they trusted their teams to act wisely…

The data is in, this too shall pass.

Photo by Andrey Zvyagintsev on Unsplash

And — you can be stronger, smarter, better prepared for the next challenge. We can learn, prepare, and adapt — including in our mental health.

Do you know why brushing and flossing are good for your teeth? Cool!

How about we try for the same level of habits for mental wellness?

Easy daily habits like waking up with gratitude (yeah coffee!!), easy walks, and time with friends boosts our brain chemistry and raises the barriers to depression & anxiety.

This is the equivalent of brushing your teeth, a baseline of self care.

Ready for better — with higher level rewards?

Not exactly the Mothers Day Card I planned.

Photo by Jose Escobar on Unsplash

My mom’s biggest fear was looking bad to other people.

She couldn’t swim or drive or ride a bicycle because she was afraid she would fail at learning them. She worried about my grades — because of what other people would think. She wanted me to take a career path that would impress her friends. She taught me this perspective whenever possible.

Mom meant well — but she couldn’t see outside her fear box.

But Dad

On the flip side, my dad didn’t much care what people thought, I read about people who didn’t care, and my friends were kids (kids rarely care what…

Seems reasonable until some-one goes and does it.

Working at a client site a few years ago, I interviewed 100+ people about a problem I was hired to solve. This is a company known for hiring the brightest minds.

Every person said “we can’t do that, it’s not possible” and then they explained why. I knew that it was possible — and kept investigating.

The thing we think we know but are dead wrong about

Do you know that saying “it’s not what we don’t know that gets us into trouble but rather the thing we think we know but are dead wrong about” — it’s been attributed to Mark Twain (but apparently that’s a mis-attribution). …

Love this!!

I had no idea about Stevie's origin story - thank you!!

And mad props to the guy who gave you some attention and kept you moving forward :-)

Bill Lennan

Mental wellness fan. Ardent believer in effort. Parent, partner, persistent, physical. Co-Founder The HAERT™ Program. DBT is awesome :-)

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